There is a chance that you know where I am going with this post. If you know me. So, many of you may know that I recently got the coolest puppy on the planet, Rocket. He’s a mini wire hair Dachshund (a fuzzy wiener dog). And he weighs about three pounds. That’s what you need to know going forward (picture to follow).

The Story

This tale begins at a lovely farmer’s market in SE Portland. My good friend Molly and I were perusing the delectable deliciousness, finding ingredients to make Molly’s famous pita treats (yet to be named). Once we had picked out all the items we would need, we had to head to New Seasons to grab a few outstanding necessities. The thing is, when you walk around with a puppy like Rocket, you’re bound to get stopped and have many many comments about cuteness, which I have come to accept and somewhat enjoy.

What I do not expect, nor somewhat enjoy is harassing comments by passersby. Honestly, it has never happened. So, much to my surprise, as Molly, Rocket, and I were meandering down the SE sidewalk, it happened. Two joggers were heading our way, so we politely made space for them to sneak by (I shortened Rocket’s leash). A nice gesture from us I would think.

On this occasion, however, it was met with a different response. As they passed one of them in the most snarky, smug voice imaginable (to his friend but loud enough that we could hear it) says, “Nice cat. Heh.”

Nice.

Cat.

Heh.

In honor of one of my very best friends, Nate Smith, let me give you the Top Five Responses I Should Have Given That Guy, But Didn’t Because I Am A Nice Guy. All these responses are said with a matching smugness:

5. “Nice Hair Piece. Heh.”

4. “Nice running form. Heh.”

3. “Nice choice in running outfits. Heh.”

2. “Running won’t get rid of that beer gut. Heh.”

and the one I actually used (because I’m a nice guy):

1. “It’s a dog.” (under my breath, “Douche bag.”)

All in all, poor form by that guy. But, I suppose when you look like him, you have to project whenever you can. And that’s okay. Rocket took it in stride. I had a mild reaction and Molly just cracked up. So, all is well. And now, to cheer everyone (that isn’t like that guy) up, it’s Rocket:

Stay classy!

+Joe+